Megan Sharma
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Parenting: You know you’re a mom (of young children) when…

1/3/2017

2 Comments

 
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Photo via marcisim via Visual Hunt
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  • Getting ‘all dolled up’ isn’t about beautifying yourself. It means you’re having a tea party. With dolls.
 
  • You keep kid juice (organic apple juice boxes) and adult juice (wine, wine and more wine) in the house at all times.
 
  • You need tummy control…ev-ery-thing.
 
  • Only after you’ve read all the parenting books on the market do you allow yourself to indulge in that tempting NYT Best Seller.
 
  • Shoes from your life before kids: heels, a dash of red, a sprinkle of animal print. Shoes from your mom life: they’re all flat and hella comfy. That is all.
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My high heels are now reserved for dress-up parties. Photo via jill via Visualhunt
 
  • You wish you had thought of Spanx. You’d totally be rich.
 
  • You’re tempted to frame a few scribbles on construction paper in a museum quality frame.
 
  • You are the only person in your household who knows the location of all the food items.
 
  • You drink coffee until it’s socially acceptable to drink wine.
 
  • Your idea of a spa treatment is a hot shower—alone.
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The shower is my spa. Photo via Visual Hunt
  • Just when you don’t think your heart could possibly hold any more love, it expands just a little more.
 
  • If you push your belly out just so, you can look like you’re pregnant again. It’s a gift.
 
  • You enjoy shopping more for children’s clothing and accessories than for yourself.
 
  • You put on just enough makeup to avoid looking like a zombie. Nothing more, nothing less.
 
  • You only have time to catch up with your girlfriends while driving in the car. Thank goodness for Bluetooth systems!
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Photo credit: garryknight via Visual Hunt / CC BY
 
  • You’re a master of the art of the faux shower.
 
  • Your parameters for clothing purchases include: will it hide smudges from chocolate chip cookies? Sold.
 
  • You’re practiced in spelling out words when conversing with your partner.
 
  • You listen to Kidz Bop radio when your children are not in the car.
 
  • You feel so relaxed when getting your eyebrows waxed that you don’t want to get up.
 
  • Goldfish crackers are as much a part of your purse as your credit card and driver’s license.
 
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Goldfish are manna from heaven. Photo credit: DarrellR via Visual Hunt / CC BY
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2 Comments
Barbara Marsh
1/4/2017 09:56:31 am

Very funny!! I remember those days well!! We didn't have spanx, we just let it all hang free!! ☺

Reply
Megan Sharma
1/4/2017 10:42:53 am

You didn't have Spanx, but you did have control top panty hose!

Reply



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