Our friends and family sometimes think we’re nuts. Why? Because we have taken our daughter on our many jet-setting adventures around the world. She will be two in January. Pause for reaction…
 
Yes, our little sweetie has traveled to more international destinations before the age of two than I did before I turned 30. In fact, J. took her first flight when she was only two months old so we could house-hunt in Illinois, and has been on dozens since. She’s a lucky ducky!
 
Most recently, we visited Ireland in August. It was spectacular and very child-friendly, but more on that in a future blog.
 
I would like to share some of the lessons we have learned along the way to help other parents gather up the courage to travel with their baby or toddler. We highly recommend it!
 
Let’s kick it off with the essentials for your young child.

​Milk. They want it, and you’d better have it! Here are my tips:

• Anticipate exactly how many bottles or sippy cups your child will need during your travel day. How long is the flight, train ride, or drive? What if you experience a delay? Plan accordingly, and count it out. This may seem like a daunting task, but it will pay dividends when you are prepared at the crucial moment. The night before you leave, make sure you have a supply of clean bottles ready to go.

• You are allowed to travel on U.S. airlines (and internationally), via carry on, with breast milk, prepared formula, formula powder, and whole milk. If it’s for your baby, you are entitled to take it with you.

• If you do fly with carry on milk, just be aware that you will be subject to extra security screening in the U.S. It’s not a big deal. You’ll want to separate your milk from your other carry-ons. An agent will then take that milk and you aside to test the milk—this process usually takes 5-10 minutes, depending on how much milk you are carrying. Not all airports are created equal. Some will hassle you more and take longer (we had a particularly bad experience at SFO once, but this will vary greatly).

• I DO NOT recommend carrying prepared, pre-packaged formula more than 4 oz. that is sealed and cannot be opened without spoiling it, i.e. Enfamil toddler drinks. It cannot be tested with the tools they have available at the airport and it will create problems for you. You may have to throw it away, which will hurt, since those things are so expensive! Four oz. and under beverages of the same type are fine.

• If you are breastfeeding, time out when you plan to feed and pump based on your travel itinerary. You don’t want to get stuck with a full set of boobies or a hungry baby and nowhere to go. Many airports now offer free nursing rooms for mothers. Check online before you go. Bring a feeding cover for convenience, or wear a very large sweatshirt over a nursing tank top and bra. Don’t forget to wear and bring extra nursing pads.

• Also, consider an airline lounge membership. It’s totally worth it if you travel frequently enough. We like American Airlines. It’s about $500 per year for one member who can then bring the rest of the family as guests. Otherwise, you will pay $50 per person every time you use the lounge with a day pass. They always have drinks and snacks available. You can also ask the front desk attendants if there is an empty conference room you can use to breastfeed. This was a lifesaver for me.

• If you have a toddler, give them milk to drink in the car on the way to the airport, and then rinse that cup in a restroom before you go through security. Bring extra empty sippy cups in your diaper bag/carry on. After you’ve gone through security, hit the Starbucks or any coffee shop to get your whole milk. It’s pricey at coffee shops, but typically not sold in any of the convenience stores or newsstands. Trust me, we have looked. They usually only sell nonfat milk, if that.

​

• If you are bringing your own whole milk on your travels, invest in a true insulating water bottle like the Manna bottles. Though the Manna bottles claim to maintain temperature for up to 24 hours, we have found that your cold milk will stay fresh in those bottles for 10-12 hours, which is still a huge help! Try looking at a discount store like TJ Maxx for a better price on these bottles. 

• If you will have an extended stay and need to buy formula, you can buy it locally. Target it always a good bet. I don’t suggest doing this for international trips, as formula is different in other countries and your child may be able to taste the difference, and may reject it. Enfamil makes nice individual travel packs that are convenient. You will pay more for the convenience of not having a huge formula tin taking up your luggage space.

 

• If you are traveling abroad and need to buy whole milk, gas (petrol) stations and convenience or grocery stores always have it. Make sure there is one of these establishments within a reasonable distance from where you are staying. This is always a good rule of thumb, wherever you go. Check out All The Rooms for a one-stop search of accommodation options, including Airbnb and hundreds more sites.

You can also find some great tips for traveling with your baby here.  

Stay tuned next week for part two of the baby/toddler travel guide series: What to pack. Please feel free to post your baby/toddler travel questions and experiences in the comments section! I would love to hear from you.
 
*Author’s note: these opinions are my own based on my many travel experiences. I have not been paid to endorse any products or services in this blog.

I’ve just learned the awful truth, and my world has been turned upside down.
 
No, I’m not adopted. Nope, my husband doesn’t have a secret family in Tulsa. It’s much more serious. I’ve learned the truth about swim diapers: pee is all around us.
 
Sorry, got a little too Shakespearean tragedy there. Reigning it in…
 
Let me tell you how it unfolded. I attended a play date with an Olympic obstacle course theme. Bring clothes your kids can get wet in, and a towel! Naturally, we did. I dressed Jas in a rash guard, swim diaper, swim bottoms, and cotton shorts.
 
We arrived later than most to the play date, and the kids had already conquered the obstacle course and dirtied up the kiddie pool with mud and grass, so Jas decided to occupy herself with eating chalk. A fine and colorful pastime, indeed.
 
We stayed and chatted with the hostess, Jessica, and her two daughters. I was holding Jas, admiring Jessica’s handmade painting, when I realized that Jas was peeing all over me. Oh, dear. I was grateful to have brought a change of clothes—for her, not for me, obviously. I still had to wear the pee clothes. I finally wrangled Jas long enough to get a clean diaper on her, but she refused to allow shorts. Fine, whatever. Go pants-less.
 
The next thing I know the child has pooped. I smelled it from across the room. Really, Jas? Another silent prayer of thank you that she was wearing a real diaper when this occurred. That was our cue to leave. Since the diaper bag was in the car, I changed Jas in the car trunk (don’t worry, I have a roomy SUV!) and we headed home.
 
On the way home, I called my friend Michelle, who is also a toddler mom, and told her why I was currently wearing urine covered clothing. She lamented my poor fortune but ultimately blamed the swim diaper, “they don’t absorb anything!”.
 
I have no idea why my skull is so thick, but it wasn’t until she said this that it finally clicked in my brain: swim diapers are a lie!!
 
I had always sort of wondered how a swim diaper works. The kid puts it on, they go in water, and yet the diaper doesn’t puff up at all. Do you want to know why? Because, once again, it doesn’t absorb any liquid! There is no magic here. It doesn’t somehow absorb the pee but not the entire pool of water. It absorbs NOTHING. And thus, we are swimming in pools full of toddler pee.
 
Swim diapers lure you into a false sense of security. Oh, look at me! I have Dora the Explorer on me and I will protect both you and your child from communicable disease! HAH!!! Sure, put me on in the car while you are transporting your child to a play date/water park/swim lesson and I’ll do just as good of a job as a regular diaper would! DECEPTION.
 
The most ironic thing, perhaps, is that swim diapers cost more money than regular diapers and do about half the job. If it weren’t for the terrifying possibility of a #2, they might as well swim naked, people.
 
I will never look at our YMCA swim lessons the same way again.

Today is tough. I’m not a puddle of tears crumpled on the floor like I expected to be, thankfully. But there is stomach churning. There is stinging guilt. And, oh, there is worry.
 
Our beautiful almost-16-month-old daughter, J., started part-time day care today.
 
It’s not like we didn’t know this was coming. We have planned it for months. I spent the last five mornings visiting the center with J. to help her ease in.
 
We have no complaints about the center—the teachers are wonderful and educated in early childhood development, the children are happy and engaged, and the atmosphere is transparent and welcoming. But it’s not the same as home and it never will be.
 
Last night when I should have been sleeping soundly after a super indulgent homemade Mother’s Day meal of filet mignon with bacon cream sauce, mashed potatoes, prawns, roasted peppers, and New York style cheesecake (plus a few glasses of merlot), I felt physically ill at the thought of leaving J., even for a few hours.
 
I’m not a martyr, nor do I want to be. The honest truth is that I want what’s best for Jas, and for our family as a whole. That doesn’t make it easy. At least not right now.
 
What’s best for Jas right now is to continue learning and growing and to be around other children. What’s best for me right now is to have some time during the workweek to myself, and, most importantly, to sit down and finish writing my book. And what’s best for my husband is for his two girls to be happy, so that he can also be happy.
 
I cannot wait to be able to tell J., someday soon, that I am a published author. That she inspired me and inspires me every day to be a better mommy/wife/daughter/sister/friend/neighbor. If I don’t reach for my dreams, how will she know that she can do the same?
 
It sounds like her first day at the center went fairly smoothly, which I am grateful for. Of course, I shouldn’t be surprised by her braveness. This is a kid who ran right into the ocean (on her first encounter) without a second thought.
 
Did you know that babies need at least four hugs a day for mere survival, and many more to thrive? If that’s the case, then how many hugs do mommies and daddies need? Infinity. Infinity hugs and kisses.
 
Even these few hours away from Jas (only about five, now!) have shown me that as much as she needs and depends on me, I also need her. I need her toothy smile. I need to hear her giggle with glee when we do flips on the living room couch. I need to chase her around the kitchen and then snatch her up in my arms.
 
Our family is starting a new journey. There will be changes. There will be challenges. But there will always be hope and a whole lot of love. 

​It’s interesting to realize that the word ‘parent’ is multidimensional, just like the people it describes. In simple terms, a parent is both a noun (person, place or thing) and a verb (an action, state or occurrence). Don’t worry, it gets better. 
 
As a noun, it’s the people who brought a precious baby into the world, or who adopted him/her as their own. The people who are responsible for that child’s well-being. The people who proudly answer the call for “mama” or “dada” at 2:34 a.m.
 
But, as with so many things in life, being a parent is much more about action. I’m verb-ing from sunrise to sunset as a full-time mom. And my husband is just as verb-a-licious when he’s not working his tail off.
 
What does it look like?
 
It’s putting down your phone and sharing a chuckle with your baby instead of checking your latest text message.
 
It’s meticulously combing the depths of the high chair seat for the latest food morsels: avocado, tofu, broccoli, scrambled eggs, peaches, and the like. And doing this three times a day.
 
It’s reading “Llama Llama Red Pajama” when you can barely keep your own eyes open.
 
It’s spending hours and hours comparing car seat ratings on Consumer Reports and Amazon until you find the perfect one.
 
It’s taking her on her very first ‘choo choo’ ride and loving every minute.
 
It’s insisting on socks, even when she just pulls them off three seconds later.
 
It’s celebrating things like digestive regularity. Yes, poop! I know, it’s gross!
 
It’s planning for the future, both emotionally and financially.
 
It’s visiting a place called Ergadoozy and hurting your back while leaning awkwardly over the plastic slide, so that your baby doesn’t fall out of the play structure.
 
It’s all these things, big and small, day in and day out. I can’t wait to see what comes next. 

​Oh, you moms out there (I now count myself a member of your prestigious ranks, so I can say that). You want the very best for your children. And I mean the very best. We’re talking champagne wishes and caviar dreams, ya’ll. And who could blame us?
 
Maybe you, like my amazing in-laws, decided to leave everything behind in your early thirties so that your five-year-old son and future children would have a better life in a country thousands of miles from where your ancestors were born.
 
Perhaps you quit a lucrative corporate job to stay home with your sweet baby girl. That’s what I did.
 
Or maybe you saved your pennies to send each of your kids to college debt free. That is a very special gift.
 
We want it all for our offspring, simply put. And we want them to find the right person to share their lives with.
 
We pray that our daughters will meet and marry a man who is loving, kind, patient, funny, good looking, and smart. Definitely not “The Bachelor”. Oh, god, no. Someone who has his s*** together, essentially.
 
If you think “Dr. Prince Charming” has a nice ring to it, you’re probably not alone. Just think of all the free medical advice! How should I treat a migraine? Do I need to be taking supplements? What shall I do about these warts? Oh, what fun!
 
I’m here to offer a bit of a reality check to mothers who aspire to have a surgeon-in-law (SIL):

• If you imagined getting out of those regular mammograms and colonoscopies, think again. Your SIL is going to make sure you get those done, come hell or high water.
• You’re going to have the safest grandbabies ever!
• You will get free medical advice, but it will sometimes irritate your darling SIL (especially if you constantly ask questions outside of his or her area of expertise).
• More than likely, your child and their family will be moving in order to advance your SIL’s career. Possibly more than once, and possibly for good.
• Your SIL will likely know more about your health status than you will. He/she can read between the lines.

 
My mom loves her SIL dearly and I’m sure she would carry the banner for other moms out there who want to join the club.
 
The club is pretty cool. The club comes with a free lifetime subscription to Men’s Health and Family Circle. Just kidding.