This morning was a real doozy. The kind of morning during which a headache descended on me before I could even change out of my pajamas.
 
We have been traveling quite a bit in recent weeks with our two-year-old daughter, J. When we travel, J. tends to become overly attached to us, and it generally takes a few days back in the home routine to recover.
 
J. woke before 6:00 am in our bed and began wailing for her daddy (my husband, Arun), who was in the shower. She then edged herself off the bed toward the bathroom, banging on the door to get his attention. Despite my pleas for her to return to bed to snuggle with me, she ignored me, continued crying, and laid herself down on the floor outside the bathroom.

A few minutes after the shower turned off, the door opened, and Arun invited J. in to ‘help’ him get dressed. This was all fine and dandy until Arun had to leave the house to head to work.
 
She was absolutely inconsolable. Literally screaming at the top of her lungs, tears streaming down her innocent little face. Nothing I said provided any comfort. She wouldn’t allow me to hold her. There was nothing I could do but wait out the protest. This meltdown went on for what seemed like an eternity.
 
Finally, she agreed to come back to bed with me and look at pictures on my phone. Her smile emerged behind her paci. She seemed exhausted.
 
The crying started up again when I put my phone away. Somehow, I was able to convince her to get dressed and got her off to school, thinking, “dear lord, I need a coffee!”. A coffee and a drink later. 

What can we learn from this foray into toddler dramatics? 

1.   Stubbornness (sometimes) pays off. If you set your mind to something and don’t take no for an answer, you will sometimes win. J.’s stubborn streak won her some extra face time with daddy this morning. But, ultimately, she lost the battle to get him to stay home from work.

2.   Logic doesn’t always prevail. There are certain situations in which logic will never overcome. For example, when dealing with a distraught two-year-old. Recognize this scenario and take another tact.

3.   Accept the things you cannot change. We would all do well to remember the Serenity Prayer (by Reinhold Neibuhr): 
​
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change; 
courage to change the things I can; 
and wisdom to know the difference.

4.    The sun will come out tomorrow. There is always the hope of a better tomorrow, even through the difficulties of the present.

5.   Never underestimate the power of one’s voice. Toddlers sometimes use it to exasperate their parents into submission. But we adults can use our voices to do great things.

Onward, my friends! Enjoy the rest of your week.
 
You may also like these blogs by Megan Sharma:
You know you’re a mom (of young children) when…
A no-fuss guide to your toddler’s birthday party for Pinterest-fatigued parents
Baby/toddler travel guide series: the essentials!
Baby/toddler travel guide series: what to pack
Baby/toddler travel guide series: going international
Swim diapers are a LIE
A brand new day
What is a parent?
The dawn of a new era: B.B. and A.B.
New Mommyhood Initiation

Have you ever heard a foodie or chef talk about palate fatigue? It’s when your taste buds get exhausted by monotony and say, “Hey, I quit!”. What it boils down to is too much of a good thing. Too much fat, too much citrus, too much salt, too much sugar, too much bitterness—whatever the case may be.
 
Pinterest can be much the same way. Of course, I’m one of Pinterest’s 100 million active users (85% women), but I alternate between complete infatuation with the big P and total boycott. If I allow myself to get sucked in, I can sit for hours scrolling through gorgeous images of food and fashion on my phone, pinning my life away, achieving absolutely nothing. 

In recent years, a certain persona has developed: The Pinterest Mom. Pinterest Mom is a superhero. She always brings the yummiest and most unique dishes to the potluck party, with food styling straight out of Martha Stewart Living. She sends her kids to school with the most creative bento box lunches—organic, non-GMO and made fresh daily, naturally. Her home is full of hand-made art and collage walls that could shame the Louvre. Pinterest Mom knows which exercises she can do in her car or while preparing dinner to save time at the gym. She plans her children’s birthday parties with the skill and professionalism of a seasoned wedding coordinator, right down to the striped paper straws that match the banner that match the balloons that match the gift bags that make you feel like a horribly inept parent. 
 
Pinterest Mom is incredible, no doubt, but we can’t all be her. Either she has a lot of free time on her hands or she limits herself to three hours of sleep each night, but Pinterest Mom pushes herself to the very limits of perfection. Not all of us want to live that way. 

Alas, finally—to address the title of the blog. It’s time for a toddler birthday party!
 
Our daughter, J., is turning two this month. TWO! I can’t believe it. Since I’m about 40% Pinterest Mom and 60% Practical Mom, I am not planning a big bash to mark this momentous occasion. Instead, I’m working on some fun ideas for things my husband and I can do with J. to give her a special day.
 
Let’s be real. A one or two-year-old does not give a flying fork full of mashed potatoes about a themed and perfectly executed soiree. They don’t need a bouncy house, a magician, a petting zoo, real Disney princesses and gourmet catering for the entire neighborhood.
 
All they want is an empty box to climb into and some wrapping paper to shred into oblivion. Who are we to deny them these simple joys?

Here are some fun ideas for birthday/special occasion activities you can do with your toddler:
 

• Let them do whatever you normally shy away from allowing because it is too messy or too inconvenient for you. Examples: painting, making cookies from scratch, removing every single pair of underwear from your drawer and wearing it on their head, having an extended and extra loud dance party, making a Lego tower using thousands of Legos, giving the dog a bath and blow-dry.

• Help them spend time with their favorite people. Usually that’s you (the parents), as well as grandparents, aunts and uncles, cousins, and perhaps a friend or two. It doesn’t all have to be on the same day and it doesn’t even have to be in person. Skype and FaceTime are great for long distance loved ones.

 
Most of all, enjoy the festivities and savor these moments!

​

• Getting ‘all dolled up’ isn’t about beautifying yourself. It means you’re having a tea party. With dolls.

 

• You keep kid juice (organic apple juice boxes) and adult juice (wine, wine and more wine) in the house at all times.

 

• You need tummy control…ev-ery-thing.

 

• Only after you’ve read all the parenting books on the market do you allow yourself to indulge in that tempting NYT Best Seller.

 

• Shoes from your life before kids: heels, a dash of red, a sprinkle of animal print. Shoes from your mom life: they’re all flat and hella comfy. That is all.

 

• You wish you had thought of Spanx. You’d totally be rich.

 

• You’re tempted to frame a few scribbles on construction paper in a museum quality frame.

 

• You are the only person in your household who knows the location of all the food items.

 

• You drink coffee until it’s socially acceptable to drink wine.

 

• Your idea of a spa treatment is a hot shower—alone.

• Just when you don’t think your heart could possibly hold any more love, it expands just a little more.

 

• If you push your belly out just so, you can look like you’re pregnant again. It’s a gift.

 

• You enjoy shopping more for children’s clothing and accessories than for yourself.

 

• You put on just enough makeup to avoid looking like a zombie. Nothing more, nothing less.

 

• You only have time to catch up with your girlfriends while driving in the car. Thank goodness for Bluetooth systems!

 

• You’re a master of the art of the faux shower.

 

• Your parameters for clothing purchases include: will it hide smudges from chocolate chip cookies? Sold.

 

• You’re practiced in spelling out words when conversing with your partner.

 

• You listen to Kidz Bop radio when your children are not in the car.

 

• You feel so relaxed when getting your eyebrows waxed that you don’t want to get up.

 

• Goldfish crackers are as much a part of your purse as your credit card and driver’s license.

Why is this time of year both so magical and so stressful? Why do we dash from store to store looking for the perfect gifts, wait in crazy lines at the post office, and stay up until 11:34 pm baking gobs of goodies for the neighbors? One word: expectations.
 
The key to a less manic and happier holiday season is to manage expectations: starting with ourselves and branching out to our loved ones.
 
If we expect to have a more fulfilling holiday, then we will have it. If you want to say no to gifts, then do it! There is no law against not giving gifts at Christmas.
 
I’ll be perfectly honest with you: I come from a gift-giving family. Growing up, I loved getting gifts from Santa at Christmastime. I still remember the year my mom completely outdid herself (mom of the century!) with a Barbie themed Christmas that would knock your socks off. I received a Barbie limousine and a bunch of stylish Barbie duds my mom had—get this—HAND-SEWN. Can you imagine trying to sew clothing for a figure as disproportionate as Barbie? I was beyond myself with glee that year. 

And yet, now, my aging 33-year-old brain can’t recall more than a few brief glimpses of Lite-Brite and bicycles of Christmas past.
 
You see, my fondest Christmas memories are not of the things I was fortunate enough to receive. No, my most treasured Christmas memories are of the times we spent with family and friends, while my dad dressed up as Santa and pretended to feed carrots to the reindeer.
 
My favorite family Christmas traditions are hanging out in new PJs on Christmas Eve, eating fun appetizers and watching Christmas movies, and then eating a fancy breakfast on Christmas morning. Nothing too fancy.

It wasn’t until we had our daughter in 2015 that I became adamant against adult to adult Christmas gift giving. Here we were, blessed with this perfect, healthy and gorgeous little girl, and there was nothing else in the world we could possibly want.
 
It just seemed silly and pointless. Why give gifts that aren’t needed or wanted?
 
Ever since, I’ve been lobbying in my family for time together to replace physical gifts. My ultimate goal is to get our entire family together for a vacation during the Christmas season. It hasn’t happened yet, but I know we’ll get there. And ‘there’ will be somewhere on a beach.
 
It doesn’t even have to be a vacation. Unfortunately, my husband and I are smack dab in the middle of the country with our parents flanking both coasts, so travel isn’t always possible. When we are together, even if it’s not during Christmas, we aim to make the most of it. 

Want to get in on the action?
 
Here are some ideas to replace things with family time and experiences, and maybe even help someone else along the way:

• Make cookies together and distribute them to neighbors, teachers, friends, and/or a local homeless shelter.

• Go to view some holiday lights together. Drive through a well-lit neighborhood or visit a display at a local zoo or botanical garden.

 

• If you live near mountains, take a day trip to go tubing, sledding, or skiing together.

 

• Organize a silly gift exchange with a limit of $5 or $10 per person.

 

• Have a potluck lunch or brunch in someone’s home. Maybe even set up a hot chocolate bar with a variety of toppings.

 

• If your kids like trains, visit a Polar Express type of event.

 

• Go see a seasonal production like The Nutcracker ballet.

 

• Look for Christmas story time opportunities at your local book store or library.

 

• Find a place where your kids can see real live reindeer.

 

• Bundle up and go ice skating.

 

• Write Christmas cards for our men and women serving in the military.

 

• Go bargain shopping for winter clothing and canned foods, and then deliver them personally to local charities.

 

• Have a Christmas movie marathon, complete with popcorn and other yummy treats—chosen by the kids.

 

• Think of a tourist attraction in your town that you have never visited, and make it happen.

 

• Make paper snowflakes to decorate your home.

 
Wishing you a joyous holiday season and a very happy 2017!

What are your favorite holiday traditions? Share in the comments!

​Americans be travelin’. In 2015, American residents logged 1.7 billion person-trips* for leisure purposes, says the U.S. Travel Association (*person-trip=one person on an overnight trip away from home in paid accommodations, or on a day or overnight trip 50+ miles from home). 

Per me (a very reliable, attractive and expert source), the Sharma family has contributed about half a billion of those leisure trips. Just kidding. We travel a lot, but not that much. That’s why I’ve written a baby/toddler travel guide blog series.
 
I’m so excited to talk about going international with your baby or toddler! With a little preparation, you’ll be well on your way to stamping that baby passport with a smile. 

​Megan’s tips for going international:

• The first thing you will need to do is get that baby a passport! Start here for a passport for children under 16 in the U.S. Read the instructions VERY carefully and make sure you have all your paperwork, proof of identity and proof of parental relationship in order. Typically, you’ll need the child’s social security number, birth certificate, parental ID, photocopies, and your checkbook. Search here for your nearest passport acceptance facility. Save yourself A LOT OF TROUBLE and don’t attempt to take the passport photo yourself. We tried and failed miserably—not surprisingly—with a 10-month-old baby. Most passport acceptance facilities can also take the passport photo for a small fee and it’s 3000% worth every penny, especially since passport photos have downright picky requirements. 

• When you receive the baby’s passport (victory!), make a photocopy or two to travel with you. We always keep our passport photocopies separate from our actual passports while traveling in case they are lost or stolen. This will make it much easier should you need to visit your embassy.

• When the time comes to look at air travel, weigh the ticket costs against the travel time and the squirm factor of your child. As long as your child is under two years of age, they fly free in your lap. We flew from Chicago to Madrid when our daughter was 11 months old, and she did just fine as a lap child. Of course, she wasn't walking yet. When she was a year and a half, we purchased a seat for our flights between Chicago and Dublin, which worked well for us, given her age and her propensity for constant movement and for ripping in-flight magazines to shreds.

• I highly recommend, at the very least, springing for the airline seats with extra legroom (look for a label like “Economy Plus”) on any flight of 7 hours or more. We had extra legroom on the way to Madrid and regular (zero) legroom on the way back, and we kicked ourselves all the way home. Except we couldn’t kick ourselves. Because we didn’t have any legroom.

• When traveling east from the United States, depart around your child’s normal bedtime, so he/she has a fighting chance of sleeping on the flight and waking up oh-so-fresh on the European time zone on arrival. Bring the baby’s car seat for a comfy and familiar place to sleep. On the way back…it’s a total Russian roulette. I always find the jet lag on the return to be far worse than jet lag on arrival, and there’s not much you can do about that. Just try not to pack your child’s schedule full of activities until they’ve had several days to readjust to life at home.

 

• If you have an infant, consider a bulkhead seat and a bassinet. Baby can sleep in a little bassinet and your hands will be free to fiddle on your iPhone and drink cheap wine! Check with individual airlines on how to book. You may have to call. Just remember that the bulkhead seats mean that you can’t store anything under the seats in front of you, because there are no seats in front of you. You’ll have to store your diaper bag, purse, backpack, etc. in the overhead bin, which may not be super convenient with a young baby. Alternatively, a baby carrier and Boppy are awesome sleeping tools! Also, this is fairly obvious, but may not occur to a total newbie: don’t try to sit in an exit row with a baby. They will make you move.

 

• Ask about early boarding if (IF. Snort.) you need extra time to haul your stuff, yourself and your baby onto the plane without the watching, judging eyes of young and single passengers boring into you. For international flights, you automatically get to board ahead of everyone else. When you travel in the United States, however, they no longer give you the courtesy unless you fly on Southwest. The fix for this is easy: simply bring your cute baby to the counter and ask for early boarding. I’ve found this works 100 percent of the time as a mom, and about 80 percent of the time as a dad.

 

• When you arrive at your destination, try to get on the local time zone right away. Walk around and explore your surroundings. Find the nearest convenience store and buy some milk and other essentials. Ask about the nearest playground so your child can drain some energy. Coffee is your friend.

 

• If you have a baby in diapers, get used to changing diapers in strange locations: back seat of the rental car, front seat of the car, trunk of the car, in your lap, on a kitchen table, in a restaurant booth, on the floor, in a tiny airplane bathroom, on the conference room table of an airline lounge, and perhaps a park bench outside the royal palace in Madrid. Yup. We’ve done it all.

 

• Have no fear. Jump in. And take lots of photos and videos!

​My friends and family know all too well that packing is an activity that causes me a great deal of stress.

I get very anxious about forgetting essential items and being unprepared for the weather. I also tend toward overpacking for the ‘in case of’ scenarios in my head.
 
The irony is that packing is a talent of mine. I have developed templates and checklists that keep me (somewhat) sane before venturing out and about.
 
If you’re a parent, you understand that traveling with a baby or toddler means packing everything you own, whether your trip will last one night or one month. They just need so much STUFF, these babies. And woe to the parent who forgets the paci or favorite baby blanket…I don’t wish that on anyone.
 
Thus, this edition of the baby/toddler travel guide series features my packing tips for babies and toddlers. I’ll start first with the general tips, and then you’ll gaze in wonder at my actual packing list templates. Try to contain your excitement as you download your own copies of my cheat sheets. :)
 
Don’t forget to check out last week’s blog on the essentials of keeping your baby fed and happy while traveling. 

​Megan’s tried and true packing tips:

• Diapers, flushable wipes and/or regular wipes, clothes, milk/food, comfort. Pretty much everything you need for your baby falls into one of these categories. Make it your new mantra.

 

• Pack what you can fit, and buy the rest at your destination. This works well for diapers and wipes, especially. You can also ship ahead if you’re visiting a friend or relative’s home (thank you, Amazon Prime!).  

 

• In your carry on, bring extra clothes for your baby, and throw in an extra t-shirt or sweater for yourself. If you have an infant, you don’t want to spend your entire flight covered in spit up, or worse (been there, it's soooo not fun). The extra shirt is your insurance policy.

 

• Consider buying a smaller/lighter car seat just for travel if your everyday car seat is large and heavy. Bonus: the second car seat can go in your partner’s car or the grandparents' car when you’re not traveling. We use these car seats: lightweight but super safe by Graco, and everyday extremely safe but heavy by Chicco. You can compare safety and convenience features on Consumer Reports or via the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA). I personally would not use any car seat that doesn’t have side impact protection. For super detailed reviews based on child safety expert knowledge, federal ease-of-use ratings, and surveys with hundreds of parents, check out these recommendations for infant car seats and for convertible car seats. 

 

• If you're flying mid-week or another less busy time and your flight is not full, you may consider carrying on your car seat, as you may be able to use it in an empty seat next to you. Ask the airline service representative when you check in how the flight is looking. If the flight is totally booked, go ahead and check the car seat before you go through security, or plan to check it at the gate. If there's room on the flight, carry it on, and you can always gate check it if you need to.

 

• Try a roller for your car seat like this one by Britax to save your back.

 

• Get a car seat cover and stroller cover in case it rains. This helped us in Ireland and Seattle A TON, as well as other cities.  

 

• Purchase a solid and functional umbrella style stroller and carry it on. We use this one. It has a decent size storage basket, is small and light, and can be carried over your shoulder with a strap. We use it every day, in fact. Forget a bulky BOB.

 

• Invest in a baby carrier like a Baby K’Tan or an Ergo if you have a young infant. Note that some flight attendants will ask you to take the baby out of the carrier during takeoff, taxi and landing for "safety. Although I believe this to be total BS and it is applied randomly on every flight, you are legally required to follow crew member instructions, so don't press your luck.

 

• Captain Obvious here: have favorite toys, books and snacks at hand. I like to carry at least one favorite snack and a few new ones. 

 

• Since babies don't wear eye masks but still need to sleep even in the middle of the day, have them sleep in the carrier (Ergo or Baby K'Tan) with a cover or get a floppy hat with a wide brim that will cover their eyes (we swear by the hat method!). Sunglasses are also worth a shot.

 

• Make sure you have a paci (binky, whatever you call it), bottle, or sippy cup—something for the baby to suck on at takeoff and landing, to help with ear pain. You can also plan to nurse your infant for the same result. 

 

• For toddlers, create a "busy bag" with interesting things to touch/play with in plastic sandwich bags. The items don’t even have to come out of the bags to be interesting. The Target dollar section is a gold mine for this stuff. Just make sure you don't buy anything that would be too noisy/annoying for your fellow passengers. Reveal each new item one at a time, to hold your child's attention. 

 

• Pack a lightweight travel crib like the one by Guava Family (SO worth the money. Learn more about Guava Family here), which can also be carried on as a backpack or duffel bag, or arrange ahead of time for a crib at your hotel or Airbnb. Note that you never know what you're going to get when relying on others for a crib--some are old and do not meet current safety standards. Also, be sure to take an extra crib sheet in case there is an accident. Hint: you may also want to ask your host or hotel if they have a high chair available for meal time.

 

• SUPER FAMILY TRAVELER TIPS: On most U.S. airlines you may check baby essentials (car seat and stroller) for FREE. In past years, some airlines would also allow you to check a baby travel crib for free, but this no longer seems to be the case, at least with United Airlines. It's worth asking the airline attendant when you check in, but plan to pay a checked baggage fee for a travel crib. You will also have to pay for the car seat roller (don’t worry, it’s easy to carry on and store in an overhead bin--note that it will count as a carry-on item, and plan your other carry-ons accordingly).

 

• Paci clips help prevent lost pacis! We only use them while we’re flying and never in the car. It never hurts to have a few extra pacis on hand in case some go missing (as they inevitably roll to the back of the plane, never to be seen again).

 

• A baby timer like this one is super helpful to track sleep, diapers, food and medication. We have used it daily since our daughter was born.

 

• Don’t forget sleep essentials like a sound machine or sleep sack. We use the Sleep Sheep and just take the sound box on our trips.

 

• Bring the child’s birth certificate with you. Some airlines ask to verify it if the child is under two years of age (American Airlines usually does).

 
 
And now, without further ado, here are my packing lists for infants and toddlers. Scroll to the bottom of this blog to download your own templates for personal use. Enjoy and happy trails to you!
​

Stay tuned next week for part three of the baby/toddler travel guide series: Going international. Please feel free to post your baby/toddler travel questions and experiences in the comments section! I would love to hear from you.
 
*Author’s note: these opinions are my own based on my many travel experiences. I have not been paid to endorse any products or services in this blog
​
Download the packing lists for your own use here: